The foundation of any out-of-school time program isn’t just about nurturing relationships with the kids you work with, but also the relationships you build with the people around you. Whether you’re the manager or director of a group, or just want to build up your leadership skills, it’s important to recognize that the foundation of any solid team starts with great relationships.
When you foster strong relationships with your colleagues, the environment becomes more positive, supportive, and uplifting. Ultimately, out-of-school time programs become more effective. Strong relationships among staff translate to a stronger, more connected experience for kids.
So, how do you build those relationships with the people you work with? It’s a lot like teaching social emotional skills to kids—it’s about consistency, trust, and a genuine effort to connect.
Let’s dive into a few practical ways to strengthen your relationships with your colleagues to benefit you and the kids you work with.
1. Start Each Day with a Check-In
An incredibly effective practice is starting each day with a brief, non-judgmental check-in with the team. This could be as simple as going around the room and asking everyone how they’re feeling or what’s on their mind that day. This doesn’t need to take more than 5-10 minutes and it allows everyone to express how they’re doing, which can make a huge difference in how you approach the day’s work.
For example, a great question to ask at the start of the day is “What’s one thing on your mind right now?” Some days, you’ll get simple answers—”I can’t wait for lunch!”—and other days, you might experience concerns about a challenging student or an upcoming event. These regular check-ins help everyone feel more connected to one another.
2. Practice Active Listening
Building relationships isn’t just about talking; it’s about listening. When we actively listen to each other, we make our colleagues feel valued.
For example, if a colleague comes to you with a concern or a new idea, instead of immediately jumping in with your own thoughts, listen without interruption. Show empathy through body language—make eye contact, nod, and mirror what they’ve said.
You might have a staff member who is concerned about a particular activity that isn’t going well. Instead of jumping in with a solution right away, let them talk through it. After they finish, ask a few questions to clarify their concerns and offer support, letting them know their feedback was heard. This can build trust and better equip you to collaborate on a solution that works for everyone.
3. Step Into Their Shoes
Relationship (and social) skills don’t come naturally to everyone. In fact, A 2023 study by the American Psychological Association found that approximately 35% of in-person employees reported feeling socially isolated at work despite being physically present.
One of the most powerful ways to strengthen relationships with colleagues is by stepping into their shoes and seeing things from their perspective—especially if social interactions give them anxiety or making friends isn’t their strength.
Empathy helps us understand each other’s challenges, motivations, and emotions, making it easier to work together with patience and respect. If a teammate seems anxious, frustrated, or overwhelmed, take a moment to ask how they’re doing or offer a helping hand.
4. Celebrate Wins, Big and Small
We all love recognition, and taking the time to celebrate successes—whether big or small—helps build a culture of appreciation and support.
At WINGS, we use a ritual called “Compliment Corner” to offer a place for staff to shout-out each other’s wins. A corkboard or magnetic board is hung in a central location, and staff are given compliment cards to praise others with positive feedback.
It’s small but mighty! These moments of acknowledgment make staff feel valued, while fostering a sense of camaraderie among the team. Even a small “thank you” for helping with an unexpected situation or sharing a great idea can strengthen your relationships.
One of the key aspects of building strong relationships with colleagues is creating an environment of transparency. When everyone has access to the same information and is on the same page, it creates trust and reduces misunderstandings. For example, if you’re making a change to the schedule or have news from a parent meeting, make sure everyone on the team is aware.
Keep communication open through a weekly email update or a quick chat after a staff meeting — sharing and receiving feedback helps avoid surprises and makes everyone feel more informed and included in decision-making processes.
Work doesn’t have to be done in isolation. When staff members collaborate, it brings people closer together and helps them appreciate each other’s strengths — allowing relationships between them more opportunities to deepen.
For instance, instead of having one person manage an entire event, encourage staff to pair up and share responsibilities. One person might take charge of the logistics, while the other could focus on communication with the kids. Not only does this lighten the load for everyone, it fosters teamwork and allows colleagues to lean on each other for support.
7. Lead by Example: Practice What You Preach
As a leader, your actions set the tone for the team. To build a culture of respect and teamwork, you must model it to others. Try these strategies:
- Stay calm in stressful situations
- Communicate openly with staff
- Treat everyone with respect, no matter their role
When you model the same relationship-building practices you’re encouraging your team to follow, it creates a positive ripple effect throughout the program.
Building strong relationships with your colleagues is an ongoing process, just like building relationships with the kids we work with. It takes time, patience, and consistency. But by taking small, actionable steps like checking in, listening actively, celebrating wins, and leading by example, you create an environment where everyone feels supported and valued. The stronger the relationships between staff, the better the experience for the kids—and that’s something we can all get behind.
